


if i found the words

by GhostsandGhouls



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Mild Language, Not Beta Read, Prompt Fill, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-20
Updated: 2019-08-20
Packaged: 2020-09-18 20:26:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20318995
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GhostsandGhouls/pseuds/GhostsandGhouls
Summary: Iwaizumi truly loves Oikawa, he only wishes things could be simple.





	if i found the words

**Author's Note:**

> This was a compilation of prompts from an ask list. These were:  
1, “We’re not just friends and you fucking know it.” // 4, “Walk out that door and we’re through” // 10, “Just leave me alone” // 11, “I need some time” // 13, “You can’t keep pretending it didn’t happen, cause guess what? It did!” // 14, “Just please be my best friend right now, not the guy I just confessed my love to.”

Oikawa drops onto the mattress, his breathing heavy; Iwaizumi is cleaning himself down with a towel and already stepping into his clothes, "Iwa-chan, are you leaving?"

"Yeah, I've got class," Oikawa sighs, he's trying not to pout, because he knows it's silly. They're not serious and it hurts, "I'll see you later," Iwaizumi is out the door before Oikawa can muster up anything more than a hum in response. He closes his eyes, taking a moment to try and stop the ache in his heart; he pulls himself from the bed and goes to take a shower. The spray of the water eases his body, it's quick and his out and quickly dressed too; he keeps himself busy by doing some studying and even when Iwaizumi returns later, he barely moves, "Have you eaten?"

"Hm," Oikawa stretches in his chair, looking over at Iwaizumi, who's holding up a bag, "Iwa-chan! Did you bring me food?"

"Yeah, I figured you'd be dumb," Oikawa manages the strength to look at least a little offended, "Come on," Oikawa pushes away from the table, hopping up to join Iwaizumi at their small dining table; Oikawa's stomach grumbles at that moment and Iwaizumi chuckles, "I knew it."

Oikawa's pouting; Iwaizumi is still grinning, the remnants of his laughter fading, he opens up the bag and slides the take-out bowls onto the table, along with wooden chopsticks. After placing the bag to the side, they both dig in; it's fairly hot and they take their time eating, "Hey, Iwa-chan. Can I talk to you?"

"What are you doing right now?"

"Mean."

"Fine, I give you permission. So go ahead, say whatever you want."

"Do you think what we're doing is wrong?" Iwaizumi looks taken aback and Oikawa forces a grin, he hopes Iwaizumi doesn't notice that it is forced, "I mean! Just think, there are so many cute girls out there waiting for me."

"If that's what you want. We don't have to continue anything. We're not dating."

"Yeah, you're right," Oikawa turns back to his food. He doesn't feel as hungry any longer, but he forces himself through the bowl, he knows Iwaizumi would only get mad at him; when he's finished, he stands to put the rubbish into the trash and smiles, there's no happiness behind it though. His chest hurts, "I guess it's for the best! We are friends, after all, it's bound to be weird at some point."

Iwaizumi scoffs and Oikawa turns to face him, "We're not just friends and you fucking know it."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"What logical person fucks their friend like that?"

"I thought you were the smart one out of both of us, Iwa-chan. You still fucked me."

Iwaizumi slams his hands on the table, rising to his feet, "Oikawa--"

"I understand, it was all a drunken mistake," Oikawa laughs, there’s no joy in it and Iwaizumi frowns, “I didn’t expect you to ever feel anything,” He walks across the room and pulls on his coat; Iwaizumi is blinking rapidly, he doesn’t want Oikawa to leave, not like this, “I need some time.”

“Oikawa,” Oikawa’s hand reaches the door handle, he pauses for a moment, “Walk out that door and we’re through, as friends too. You can’t run away from this.”

“Iwa-chan, we’re already through,” Oikawa has to take a deep breath, a tear still falls down his cheek, “Goodbye.” Iwaizumi can only watch him go now, he feels like something had broke between them; he should have kept his mouth closed, he’s so goddamn stupid.

* * *

A week passes without Oikawa returning to their apartment, Iwaizumi can only assume that he’s spending time at Hanamaki and Matsukawa’s apartment, they haven’t even texted since the fight, he still hates himself for what he said. Iwaizumi truly loves Oikawa, he only wishes things could be simple. Iwaizumi finds himself with a rare free weekend and, after checking things over with Hanamaki, he’s on the train; he’s not sure what he’s going to say to Oikawa, but he needs to see him. The journey isn’t long, just short of an hour, and the walk is even shorter, but Iwaizumi’s breathing already feels heavy, he knows that neither Hanamaki or Matsukawa will be here. His hand hovers at the door and he has to take a deep breath before wrapping his knuckles against the wood, he’s only waiting a moment until Oikawa answers, the smile on his face dies and he visibly swallows, “Iwa-chan, what are you doing here?”

“I’m here for you. I wanted to apologise.”

“You should just leave me alone, I’m not worth that.”

“You are! Stop being stupid, you’re my best-friend, I can’t lose that. I’m sorry.”

“I can’t keep pretending nothing happened, and you always seem to,” Oikawa sighs, Iwaizumi has to resist the urge to reach out, “You can’t keep pretending it did happen, ‘cause guess what? It did.”

“Please, Oikawa, I’m so sorry. I--” He stops himself, swallowing for a moment, “I need you.”

“Do you know why it hurts?” Iwaizumi shakes his head, he still has an urge to reach out and hold Oikawa, because it hurts him too, he doesn’t like seeing Oikawa like this...He doesn’t like being the cause of it, “Iwa-chan, I love you. I’m completely and hopelessly in love with you, you don’t even notice it. You don’t care.”

“Tōru, I do care. I’m sorry I never noticed before, I thought it was just a fling. You never seemed bothered by it.”

Oikawa sniffs, he looks away from Iwaizumi for a second; Iwaizumi can’t help himself, he steps forward and pulls him into his arms. Oikawa holds onto Iwaizumi, crying messily into his shirt, Iwaizumi doesn’t mind, he still hasn’t managed to admit his own feelings, but he wants to hold Oikawa, “I-Iwa-chan,” Oikawa sniffles, Iwaizumi hums softly, running his fingers into Oikawa’s hair, “Just, please, be my best-friend right now, not the guy I just confessed my love to.”

“Why can’t I be both?” Oikawa looks up; Iwaizumi smiles at his messy face, he’d say Oikawa looks ugly, he always said Oikawa looks ugly when he cries, but it isn’t true and his hands cup Oikawa’s cheeks, so he can brush away the tears with his thumbs, “Tōru, I love you too.”

Oikawa blinks a few times, his mouth dropping, “B-but, Iwa-chan…”

“No buts. I won’t run away from this too, I thought if I could be with you, even just physically, that it would help. I wanted it to go away at first because we were friends and I didn’t want to ruin things between us. I didn’t know what to do.”

Oikawa laughs, it’s music to Iwaizumi’s ears, “Hajime, you’re so dumb.”

“Does that mean I can’t be your boyfriend?”

“Hm," Iwaizumi waits, holding his breath, “You really are dumb! Of course, I only date idiots, it’s a very niche category.”

Iwaizumi chuckled, he hugs Oikawa close and sighs softly, “Good, I love you.”

“I love you too, idiot.” Iwaizumi would usually fight back, but he doesn’t have the energy, Oikawa could say anything to him right now, it wouldn’t matter. Iwaizumi has already heard what he needs to, and he said it back, they’re fine. They’ll always be fine.

**Author's Note:**

> This is also on my [Tumblr](https://caelumswriting.tumblr.com/post/187131861044/the-prompts-1410111314-that-should-give-you), if anyone's is feeling up to supporting me over there. OR, if you wanna talk about IwaOi/UshiTen/KyouHaba/KuroShou -- or anything else!! I'm usually around :D


End file.
